Here’s a challenge for all you smart ones !

These are pretty clever. Don’t rush. Study each picture and try to determine what it represents before looking at the answer below the picture.

Put on your thinking caps.


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eggplant

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Doctor Pepper


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pool table

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Tap dancers

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Card Shark

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The King of Pop

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I Pod

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Gator-Aide

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Knight mare

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Hole Milk



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Light Beer

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Get ’em all?
Com’on be honest!

Must Read! 3-Minute Management Course.

Lesson 1
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing
up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in
a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the
next-door neighbour.  Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you
£800 to drop that towel.”  After thinking for a moment, the woman drops
her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands
her £800 and leaves.  The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back
upstairs.  When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was
that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbour,” she replies. “Great!” the
husband says, “did he say anything about the £800 he owes me?”
Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with
your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent avoidable
exposure.

Lesson 2

A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs,
forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After
controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.The nun said,
“Father, remember Psalm 129?”  The priest removed his hand. But, changing
gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said,
“Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest
apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent,
the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to
look up Psalm 129.  It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will
find glory.”
Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great
opportunity.

Lesson 3
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes
out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish.” Me first! Me
first!” says the admin clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a
speedboat, without a care in the world.” Puff!  She’s gone.  Me next! Me
next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach
with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the
love of my life.” Puff!  He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the
manager.  The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after
lunch.”
Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say

Lesson 4
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.  A small rabbit saw
the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?” The
eagle answered: “Sure, why not.”  So, the rabbit sat on the ground below
the eagle and rested.  All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the
rabbit and ate it.
Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be very, very high up.

Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to
get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the
energy.”  “Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied
the bull.  They’re packed with nutrients.”  The turkey pecked at a lump of
dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest
branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached
the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly
perched at the top of the tree.  He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who
shot him out of the tree.
Moral of the story:
Bullsh!t might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

Lesson 6
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground into a large field.  While he was lying
there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.  As the frozen bird lay
there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The
dung was actually thawing him out!  He lay there all warm and happy, and
soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird
singing and came to investigate.  Following the sound, the cat discovered
the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:
(1) Not everyone who sh!ts on you is your enemy
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of sh!t is your friend
(3) And when you’re in deep sh!t, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends the 3-minute management course
Have a great weekend

The Banana Test!

Don’t scroll past the animals until you have decided upon your answer.

 

 

 



The Banana Test

There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals,

A Lion , A Chimp Giraffe ,
……AND…
 

A Squirrel 

They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree.

Who do you guess will win?  

Your answer will reflect your personality.

So think carefully . . .
Try and answer within 30 seconds.
 Got your answer?

Now scroll down to see the analysis.

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If your answer is:

Lion = you’re dull. 
Chimpanzee = you’re dense. 
Giraffe = you’re a complete moron. 
Squirrel = you’re hopeless.



A COCONUT TREE DOESN’T HAVE BANANAS. 

Obviously you’re stressed and overworked.
You should take some time off and relax

Got computer problems?? :P

I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control, and asked him to come over. 


Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. 


As he was walking away, I called after him, ‘So, what was wrong ?

He replied, ‘It was an ID ten T error.’

I didn’t want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,

‘An, ID ten T error? What’s that? In case I need to fix it again.’

Eric grinned…. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?

‘No,’ I replied.

‘Write it down,’ he said, ‘and I think you’ll figure it out.’

So I wrote down:

ID10T     

I used to like Eric, the little bastard.

“Keep The Old Motor Running.”

        The marriage of an 80-year-old man and a 20-year-old woman was the talk of the town. After being married a year, The couple went to the hospital for the birth of their first child.
      The attending nurse came out of the delivery room to congratulate the old gentleman and said, ‘This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?’
      The old man grinned and said, ‘You got to keep the old motor running.’
        The following year, The couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their second child. The same nurse was attending the delivery and again went out to congratulate the old gentleman. She said, ‘Sir, You are something else. How do you manage it?’
      The old man grinned and said, ‘You gotta keep the old motor running.’
        A year later, The couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their third child. The same nurse was there for this birth also and after the delivery, She once again approached the old gentleman, Smiled, And said, ‘Well, you surely are something else! How do you do it?’
      The old man replied, ‘It’s like I’ve told you before, ‘You got to keep the old motor running’
        The nurse, Still smiling, Patted him on the back and said: Well, I guess it’s time to change the oil.
      This one’s black.