Confessions

I push myself for you
to keep you happy, to see that smile on your face
you don’t seem to ever appreciate it
you probably can’t imagine how tough it is for me
to put my emotions behind your needs
you push me into a corner till I have to lie
just to get some space for my emotions
but then that fills me with guilt
which makes me feel worse
so then it’s like either I suffocate myself for you
or then I drown myself with guilt just so I can breathe
I’m so lost.
I’m so tired.
I’m so done.
But I can’t live without you.
Because in the most literal way,
I’m living for you.
So either I suffocate myself for you
or then I drown myself with guilt just so I can breathe.

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